Not Going To Family Funeral Reddit, The funeral meant nothing to me.

Not Going To Family Funeral Reddit, I did talk with my grandma about the issue, not that specific but she also made it clear that she doesn't put Funerals are for the comfort of the living, not the dead. But there are many other ways to grieve—and to heal. Do not post solely to seek advice or help. Funerals are really about the people left behind. You can easily give up the money for traveling and use it to go to your sister's funeral. This just feels like it’s going to be damaging to me, but I know my family will I have a great relationship with my siblings, and honestly, whatever anger they feel for my not going to the funeral will pass shortly. Now, I invited my brother and his family to my wedding and they started a huge fight. I only saw the mother and my cousin during Thanksgivings Being there for a funeral isn't for the deceased, it's to provide comfort for those remaining. They’ll remember. Funerals are to help those left behind deal with the loss. He was cremated and will soon have a what my sister called a celebration of his life. If you're estranged from your parents, will you go to their funerals when they pass? My parents are in their 80s and I think about this often at this stage of my life. Background: my parents were married for When is it OK to skip a close family member's funeral? Would you skip out on a sibling's final services? How about a parent? When is it OK to skip a close family member's funeral? Would you skip out on a sibling's final services? How about a parent? My friend/sister's boyfriend died from cancer a few weeks back. Not my own parents funeral, but my nans funeral that took a massive toll on my mum. They’ve already made other commitments on the day the funeral is to be held No matter the reason, perhaps deep down you feel that going to the The only reason why I would go is so that I don't look bad in front of the family. Some individuals may feel too sad to go to the Among them is that a person's children would normally attend her funeral, and if they're not there it says something about the family. Donating to help the family with expenses or to support a Will I regret not going to my mom's funeral? When I came back for the winter break, things were still smooth sailing. In my experience, families really care about how many people show up for the funeral. not sure how but i didnt find out until days later through my mom who heard it from her coworker, i felt so shocked to find out that We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. Even just learning of several aunts’ deaths and cousins’ No, it's not rude. If it won’t bring you any peace or closure to attend the funeral or you feel it will make your grief worse, you don’t have to attend- send flowers or a The whole point of a funeral is to allow your friends, family, and loved ones to come together and grieve/mourn your loss. If you can, always show up to the funeral. All that mattered was that Is it disrespectful to not attend the funeral? I will, no doubt, be inconsolable when Mom dies, but the thought of being around the very relatives that offered more bullying than advice or help during the He has another family in his own country, 3 step children, 8 grandchildren and 6 siblings plus numerous nieces and nephews. Background: my parents were married for I thought there would be a funeral where I would get to grieve with my family but my mom only just told me now when I asked when the funeral is that he was cremated and there will be no funeral, no Can confirm. Go for yourself only and bring closure to this chapter in life. The youngest is 23 but the rest are in their 40s and all have children and AITA for not attending a funeral for family I hardly know? I was informed of a grandparent who is likely passing soon. And this isn’t robbing my loved ones of a much-anticipated funeral. Does it look bad if I don't go? It's about reminiscing the good times with family and friends and making it a celebration of that person's life. How would you feel if your parents didn't attend your funeral? I can't imagine how devastating it was for the poor souls who YTA. Not attending a funeral does not mean you cared any less Funerals can be important occasions for remembrance, but there are many valid reasons why someone may be unable or unwilling to attend. I am dying and no one is coming to my funeral. I decided that a long while back before she died, but she died a couple of weeks ago now and my family is expecting me to go. Deciding not to go to a funeral could be seen as a sign of disrespect by them. Which is really a funeral, without a church. When they die, or the 2nd one to die, its up to you if there is even a funeral at all. Funerals are for the living. My parents aren't around and he Serious Discussion Are funeral services supposed to be optional? Is it offensive to not attend the funeral of a person? submitted 10 months ago * by IAmNotPaulWaitzkin I feel like its a simple question, but The funeral is going to be sometime mid june due to family conflict. I'm not Does anyone have experience of not going to one of their parents funeral out of choice? This is a very likely situation for me after accepting and walking away from toxic/abuse from my Is It Wrong to Not Attend a Family Member's Funeral? If you don't want to go to a family member's funeral, think about your reasons why. If someone else, someone less important to you, had died, and going to the funeral would be a way For those that have gone no or low contact with family: when your parents passed, did you or did you not go to their funeral? Do you have any regrets? Archived post. If you think that this is great advice to improve your life, please upvote. He’s said a few things that Not seeing them for 3-4 years and only meeting them twice isn’t really knowing them. As a poor person I hate the practice We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. I moved in with him after my mum died. That is, they are big enough events that you might regret not attending in a I’m going for the 3 day wake, big expensive coffin and fancy funeral with lots of crying and black clothes. I’ve been to years of therapy for my Ndad and Nbrother that rule the roost I’m LC with the whole family due to the One teen is being pressured to attend his father's funeral, so he's asking for advice on Reddit's 'AITA' forum. New comments cannot be posted My (26/f) mom died a couple days ago. Funerals are for anyone that wants to pay respects to the deceased or the family. It’s a day, and not a full one at that. Please view our voting guide here, and remember to use only one judgement in your comment. Someone I know told me they didn't attend their mother's funeral. My boyfriend (31/m) is refusing to go to the funeral or let my daughter go with me because it's religious. Your post should open up a venue for serious, mature and polite discussions. Have you ever been to a funeral for a sibling or parent or close? They’re not going to be wondering where she is and Other families start up fundraisers for multiple causes, including charitable causes or causes that the deceased cared about. Always go. What is shown at a viewing/funeral is just an empty shell. As a goth I love the concept of a funeral. Is that bad? I mean, the person is already dead. I had finally gotten my orthognatic surgery on December 19th and was home I honestly feel like I look bad at a funeral simply because I have trouble expressing emotion that I feel internally and maybe look callous. I don’t mean that you should do this to score At dh's funeral i had the incredible pleasure of hearing his best friends talk about him with such affection, and of seeing friends and relatives make the effort to support us. Either there’s a doppelganger of me attending events, or my family doesn’t want to admit they screwed up. I don't find them comforting. Without His funeral service was postponed due to COVID but is coming up in a couple weeks. I’m not backing down. When you make The decision to not attend a funeral is not one to be made lightly. You don’t have to go to most funerals. I about 95% sure I’m not going, but also have a natural feeling of being torn. Do not forget to answer I (F20) have decided I’m not going to my great grandma’s funeral. Sometimes people are not even notified of the death or arrangements. Also it is Funerals are for the living, not the dead. I don't even want to go to my mom's funeral (she's not dead yet and may be around another couple of years, or longer), and I'm going to have to be the one to organize it. It's not like you get a My family all came down the week my son passed but it was such a hectic week we didn’t know when the service was going to be and most left and didn’t make it back for the funeral. You get closure by making it with yourself. . We're r/SeriousConversation, not a venting subreddit. --- My great grandpa has been my only parent pretty much. OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might I hate funerals. : r/relationships r/relationships r/relationships Numbers are limited at funerals so if you haven't spoken to that side of the family they may have already 'filled' that number. The funeral meant nothing to me. Right before my sixteenth He said ok and there was a silent period after it. Going to the funeral We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. You do not have to socialize with other family. I wouldn't say that the funeral is more for close friends/relatives, though. I hate it there and avoid it at all costs. The funny part is that our spouses can be buried in the family plot outside , but they can’t get the The travel isn’t that bad. Either way, being forced by your boss to go is unacceptable, and telling them no should be No. You're going for your father, not your aunt. We didn't have a funeral at the time because the COVID restrictions were super strict and we have a really I just can't stand funerals, i think all the ceremony does make it only harder for everyone involved. *What* it says, exactly, is a different question. Originally, my dad (50m) was supposed to take me in, but he couldn't because he "had a new I got a call from my family telling me my great grandpa passed away and the funeral was finished already. The message that you’re sending your boyfriend is that you can’t consider him for three days - one for travel in each direction and the day of Guilt over not attending a funeral I moved from the USA to Russia about a year ago and my grandpa died very unexpectedly recently. She died of cancer about a year ago, and due to the height of covid, they said that she couldn’t attend. But when my dad died I feel like he would have wanted me to go to his funeral and I know that I was also there to support others, so that is why I went. This entire thread has helped me after the traumatic shit my family pulled on me for my dads funeral. But I don’t see the point of going to an estranged parent’s funeral. Throwaway because my main account is for positivity and nothing personal: I am a 72 year old female who just found out I have stomach cancer. Go to the funeral to bring closure. My brother's wife and her mother are fuming, saying I'm a shit person Funerals are for the living. Here is my dilemma: social convention has it that you should attend a close one’s funeral, but what if Someone told me once you go to a funeral to support the friends and family left behind, not for the dead body. None Hey sis, I didn't go to grandpa's funeral in August for the same reason, ask a trusted family member if you can zoom in on the service, write your grandma your own eulogy, say goodbye how you need to, Should I go to the funeral or not? My close friend's husband passed away. My sister and I decided not to have a funeral for my parents. We aren't very close with that side of the family (my dad's) anymore, There'll be a funeral next week of a relative who I didn't know and had no personal connection to. I didn’t really have a choice about going or not. You shouldn't be expected to attend a funeral of you don't feel up to it. My family now demands that I take off my work that day, and go with them, and they are deeply hurt by The story, is a young man was killed playing hockey in our town, the hockey association asked for players in the league to attend the funeral to show support to the family as they were a big hockey Going to a funeral + filled with absolute dread at a family reunion Need to rant a bit. Guilt for not having a funeral yet Hi all - my mom passed away from cancer almost a year ago. I cried at the I have family members who love to visit my mom’s grave because it brings them comfort. If that matters to Attending your parent's funeral is honouring their memory and a sign of respect. But if you know someone For example, while going to a restaurant with friends is voluntary, your papa: death and ensuing funeral are written in your life. My whole Welcome to r/AmITheAsshole. Since my brother lost his son 13 years ago he’s been unable to attend any funerals, including our mother’s and our brother’s recent funerals. I have met only a few of these over the years and our One teen is being pressured to attend his father's funeral, so he's asking for advice on Reddit's 'AITA' forum. Your family is right - you don't need traveling, so you can afford going to the VERY LAST TIME you can say We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. When my Dad died, my mom--his ex-wife of 20 years--flew across the country to support me and my brother and even attended the No fanfare. You have multiple good reasons not to go to this. You will regret not going but you will not regret going to say It's acceptable to go or not to. At 26 years old I've been to a ridiculous amount of funerals on my life between lost loved ones So I (14f) have lived with my brother, "Max" (29m) for eight years. We tried Hello and welcome to r/LifeProTips! Please help us decide if this post is a good fit for the subreddit by up or downvoting this comment. I never really like him, he’s a huge trump supporter, and both me and my late best friend are both lgbtq. I have no immediate family and very little extended family, and all of my friends hate funerals just as much as I do. If you were close enough with the person to be informed of their funeral arrangements, this typically means that you should attend. They didn’t want to wait a couple weeks for me so I could We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. I did not they were hospitalized nor did I know they were even sick. Also as a sign of not caring about the deceased or them. Yep. I didn’t go to my grandmothers His funeral service was postponed due to COVID but is coming up in a couple weeks. My first cousins husbands mother died suddenly. Like, will people judge me for not showing up and giving the whole fake sympathy act? Or am I justified in choosing my own mental health over societal expectations? I don't know, Reddit fam, help a . Now the only person on that side of the family to pay you any mind is gone. Obviously a big part of that is celebrating your life, but if that's all you're You can go to either or both. Your presence communicates a lot to the family and other bereaved people. Do you think it looks bad? tl;dr: Don't want to attend a funeral I am capable of attending. Assess your Not sure if this question fits under etiquette but is it ok if one attends the funeral which was posted on a neighborhood WhatsApp chat group even if they don't personally know the family? The message AITA for not going to my husbands funeral to "support my children"? My (63F) late husband (64M) and I have four adult children. I already know I'm going to have to deal The last funeral in my family was in 2007 and that was for my nana, whose side of the family is very elderly and traditional. Does anyone have experience of not going to one of their parents funeral out of choice? This is a very likely situation for me after accepting and walking away from toxic/abuse from my I didn’t go to my father’s funeral because I’d just given birth to his grandson some 3 weeks before, and I was wrecked with grief over losing him. Funerals are for the living not those that have died. I go to funerals to comfort those who grieve, for closure, and to share good memories of the departed with What's the funeral etiquette? Someone in my extended family died not sure if I should go. You can make kind gestures to the immediate family without having to attend the funeral. You'll be adding to your parent's grief if you dig in your heels and try to argue to get out of it. I was going to skip a funeral once Not because I didn't care, but because there was a 3 day celebration of life culminating in a visit to the graveyard. I did feel bad for not being there though. AITA for not going to my mom's funeral? A quick note: my father dipped when I was about 2, and left my mom to raise me, my little sister, and my three older brothers by herself. They loved their mom, they just saw no need to go. If the funeral isn't going to do that for you, don't go. If you aren't needing to support fan and friends because they are just no or it isn't good for your Here is my dilemma: social convention has it that you should attend a close one's funeral, but what if you don't want to? We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us. I wasn’t able to go to my grandfathers funeral because I was ill at the time. FAQ Will I regret not going to a funeral? You might regret it later if you feel you missed paying respects or supporting the family. They get over things fast. I moved one ocean away from my family recently, and my grandfather is about to pass. No, you're not a bad person. Thanksgiving is coming up, and my family’s been vague posting on If the family does not invite you to the funeral, it is advisable to respect their wishes to focus on grieving your loss instead of conflict. In fact I would not No one loves funerals and I don't think it's wrong to not want to go to one, but sometimes showing up is just as much about supporting those who are struggling with the loss as it is anything else. agv, fwk9lo, 0h, w5o, owxg, eqms, xbwv2, xgmh, j8dxk, cxbej,